Some Background to My Forthcoming Advice
I vividly recall a turning point in my life: March 15th, 2010. It marked the onset of a profound period of doubt, a stark contrast to my extensive background in theology. Having graduated a decade earlier with a ThM in theology and spent the subsequent years teaching both theology and apologetics, I was well-versed in the art of addressing doubts and questions about faith. There was scarcely a question I hadn’t deeply contemplated, wrestled with, and “resolved” to my satisfaction. Yet, on that particular day in 2010, something shifted inexplicably in my mind. Despite the rational coherence of my Christian beliefs, an internal fracture emerged. My brain, normally an ally in matters of faith, seemed to malfunction. Emotionally, I found myself unable to embrace the beliefs I had always held dear, even though I desperately wanted to.
I Hated to Read the Bible
This internal struggle even affected my relationship with the Bible. Previously a source of comfort, it now became a trigger for overwhelming doubts. Each attempt to find solace or answers within its pages seemed to only deepen my uncertainties. Reading the historical books was particularly challenging, leaving me with more questions than reassurances. Only the Psalms offered some respite, but the rest of the Scripture seemed to exacerbate my doubts. This story, my personal journey through doubt and the struggle to reconcile faith with a troubled mind, is where I want to begin.
The Dark Side of Doubt
Despite risking many people’s opinions of me, I feel compelled to address those among you grappling with this kind of profound Christian doubt—doubt in a central Christian doctrine, doubt in your salvation, or doubt as to whether you have committed the unforgivable sin (the big three doubts). This isn’t merely about doubting a specific doctrine or theological view as this is often healthy. This is about what I call the “dark side of doubt.” It’s about the kind of relentless doubt that targets what you hold dearest. In this case, it’s your faith, but it could be any number of things like the faithfulness of the one you love, whether or not the house is protected from carbon monoxide, or whether or not you’re gonna get cancer. Even when you find satisfactory answers to these kind of doubt, they’re fleeting. The doubt resurfaces, sometimes in a slightly different form, becoming progressively more distressing than any previous doubts.
My Advice:Put Down the Bible (for Now)
Having outlined this, here’s my (seemingly radical) advice to those of you suffering Christian doubt: temporarily cease reading your Bible and any apologetics books. Most crucially, avoid online resources AND COMMENTS that focus on answering the questions behind your doubts. These only exacerbate and prolong your distress. Your cognitive processes aren’t functioning correctly right now. In clinical terms, this is often labeled as religious OCD or Scrupulosity. It’s a state where your cognitive functioning doesn’t lead to resolution but spirals into more and increasingly more severe questions and doubts.
Addressing the Real Issue: Indubibility
You’ll be able to return to your religious studies routine soon, but first, this episode must be addressed. Rationality isn’t your ally here since your current state impedes rational thinking. You might believe rational solutions are effective, as they provide temporary relief. However, the doubts inevitably return, sometimes morphing into new uncertainties. The issue is that your mind is seeking absolute certainty as a means to feel safe, right, or content. Yet, such infallible certainty is unattainable in any circumstance. Normally, we subconsciously understand this and are able to function. But not during these episodes. Indubitability (the absolute inability to wrong) is not your solace as it is not even possible for anyone but God to have this. Your mind is broke and it’s telling you, subconsciously, that you must to be indubitable to be safe.
Your Mind Needs a Break
Your mind needs a break from this relentless search for answers. Your intellectual capability to feed your soul is broken and needs rest from what you hold most dear. In this case, it’s your Christian faith. When you read your Bible or listen to apologetics, all you will do is prolong the problem or find new ones. I understand this might sound strange, but I ask you to trust me. I’ve helped hundreds of people with similar experiences.
Getting Help
It’s crucial to consult with a cognitive therapist experienced in treating scrupulosity. They can provide the specific guidance and support you need during this challenging time. I know it hurts. I know it’s not easy to follow these instructions. I know you will doubt my present advice. But when nothing else works, come back here and at least give my advice a try.
11 replies to "“Stop Reading Your Bible”: My Advice for Those Experiencing the Dark Side of Doubt"
This may be some good advice. It’s like, theology is your JOB, it’s your WORK. And in THAT line of WORK, you really do work SEVEN days a week. You never really get an opportunity for only working SIX days with a day off.
Now, don’t get me wrong…in my line of work, working 7 days a week is about 16 hours or more of overtime pay, therefore, I’m ok with working 7 days a week. For me, “someday” is 8 days a week.
But yes, rest is good. Having a fresh mind is healthy.
Having said all that, I have a saying. Many in the apologetics field tend to study “church fathers”, or “commentary” to see if the bible is right. But it’s better to study the Bible to see if the preacher is right.
The Catholics are right about one thing…we have way too many denominations, and each one of them has their own set of apologetics. And what it boils down to is what someone else decided FOR YOU what you are to believe. In essence, many don’t believe the Bible…they believe Church Father so-and-so’s interpretation of said passage, creating their own doctrine, and therefore, you become an apologetic of THAT denominational doctrine, hence, the online debates, friendly as they may be. And all this goes back to the reformation, some 600 years ago, when a group of people had a meeting that neither you, nor I was invited to. No hotel reservation, no per diem, no sight seeing, no rental car.
In short, I could care less of what THEY all thought about ANYTHING. I will stand before the Lord ALL BY MYSELF, and I can’t say, “Well, Augustine said…”. Notice that Jesus asks, “What is written, and how do you understand it”? YOU. Not Augustine.
Luke 10:26-28
26 He said unto him, What is written in the law? how readest thou?
27 And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.
28 And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right: this do, and thou shalt live.
By the way, church fathers have some strange names…hippopotamus? I know what a Hippo looks like…but to be named after an animal? LOL.
I don’t concern myself with church history, or church fathers. What’s the point? Many say that we have to, in order to understand the CULTURE of the people of the Bible AT THAT TIME, blah, blah.
NO we don’t. The words of the Bible TRANSEND culture. There is nothing new under the sun.
In short, the Bible is simple. Section one…NO LAW (ABRAHAM). Section two…LAW (Moses). Section three…NO LAW again (Jesus).
Sin is imputed under ONE OF THOSE, even though people sin under all of those. Which one is the KNOWLEDGE of sin, and what was the name of the tree in the garden that God said to not eat from? KNOWLEDGE! Ignorance is bliss! The more educated you are, the more that Satan is pleased. Your eyes will be OPENED! You will be as gods!
Yes, take a break! A Sabatical (vacation) is needed from time to time, to refresh the mind.
Try telling that to an atheist. He will tell you that your “infallible” is false, no matter how much you stress the word “infallible”. How do you “convince” an atheist that your infallible is not false? Just because? If it were that easy, we wouldn’t have atheists at all.
Hitchens and Dawkins can definately make one RETHINK their beliefs, regarding “revelation”. They are good at what they do, let me tell ya! Hitchens is so fast at his speech, that he doesn’t even give anyone time to think otherwise! He’s good. But NOW he’s probably admitting that you were right all along. But not while he was alive!
And yet, he’s still an atheist. That includes rejecting Catholicism as well as protestsntism, or enlightenment stuff.
In regards to your Eucharist, I think that is the most ridiculous ritual I’ve ever heard of.
And to think that Protestants modified the Eucharist to a ritual called Communion is just as ridiculous.
I have no idea who Joachim of Fiore even is, which is my whole point. I don’t care who he is, or what he believed. This is what I found by studying the Bible. As I said, I stand before God ALONE, and I must give an account. But, if you want to write a book about me, and include it in your Catholic library… lol.
Now, how or why did I come to that conclusion? I wanted to know why 7th Day Adventists insist on going to church on Saturday.
Romans 3:21
21 But now the righteousness of God without the law is manifested, being witnessed by the law and the prophets;
The key word…righteousness. SDA doesn’t get it. And they do a lot of Catholic bashing.
Now, on the Jew side, the law of Moses…
Deuteronomy 6:25
And it shall be our righteousness, if we observe to do all these commandments before the Lord our God, as he hath commanded us.
When will you get the hint that I have no presuppositions at all.?
When I read 1 Cor 11, all I see is an ethics lesson on how to conduct yourself at the dinner table at a chicken banquet at church. Paul uses the last supper as the example, which one person served the meal, and no one went hungry. Then Paul ends the story by admonishing people that if you are that hungry, EAT AT HOME. This whole thing was an admonishment of BEHAVIOUR, because some people were gorging food, getting drunk, while others go hungry and get nothing. But you turn it into a goofy ritual.
I have no presuppositions, because I have no idea who your church fathers are, what they wrote, or those who oppose them, or what they wrote.
All I know is what the Bible states. I make my own conclusions. I’m nondenominational, I’m beholden to no denomination beliefs.
No, the Eucharist was already a corrupted dogma.
No, the Eucharist was already a corrupted dogma. Everything about the Passover is SPIRIRUALLY about Jesus. The wine, bread, LAMB CHOPS. Spiritually, not literally. Your literal is ridiculous.
Faith is trusting God. You don’t have to have all the answers to trust God. He is so big, we know nothing of what he knows AND he does not expect us to know, he expects us to know,,he knows.
He wants us to know him. There is only one way to get to know him and that is the way he has revealed himself, the Bible. Still trying to get to know God by reading the Bible falls short because, he is God. He gives us enough to trust that he is and he wants us. We cannot understand earthly things (we think we can) how can we understand heavenly things? God is big,, getting to know him is about knowledge but it goes far beyond knowing. Resting in knowing as much as we can know, is faith. Trusting when we don’t understand is faith.