UPDATE 2: Zach has a condition called Idiopathic thrombocytopenic purpura (ITP). It is from the virus that attacted him. The virus is gone but the ITP is still there. The condition is not too serious, we just have to make sure his blood platelets rise soon. This comes through diet (eating meats and food high in iron rather than popsicles!). Zach, like the rest of my children hate to eat (they did not get it from me!). Anyway, as long as he does not have any injuries (especially head) he should be OK. The only danger is him bleeding really bad. Thank you all so much for your prayers. I don’t think I have ever had such a discouraging and encouraging day at once like that. You all are wonderful.

UPDATE: Just got the word. Zach does NOT have leukemia! The whole doctors office thought he did. I think they were a bit surprised! He does have low blood platelets which are a cause for concern, but I will take that any day over what we were thinking. I am exhausted, drained, beat, and relieved. Thanks so much for stepping in and praying for me when I could not.

Zach, my 2 year old son, just went to the doctor. A couple of weeks ago we discovered that there were many bruises all over his legs, much more than normal. There were also some large bruises on his back. While this made my wife very nervous, I did not think much of it since Zach is so active (he climbs on everything and fall 27 times a day). My wife searched the internet and found out that these are symptoms of leukemia. This had her very worried as you might imagine. We took him to the doctor who said that he thought it was a virus and to wait and see if the bruises come back.

Last week the bruises went away (for the most part), but there were blood capillaries that were all over his back (another sign of leukemia but also of the virus).

This week the bruises came back. We took him back to the doctor and he said that he thought it was leukemia. He ordered blood work. We should know in the next few hours.

I am really scared to pray. I don’t know why. I feel as if I am back in this place of dread that I have found myself in twice over the last five years, once with my sister and once with my mother. Neither of those turned out too well. I don’t know what the Lord has planned, but I fear the worst. When I try to pray I cannot complete my request. I think it is because I am afraid of being disappointed again. I am afraid that the Lord may have the most dreadful plans that I can imagine. I am too afraid to say, “Your will be done” since I have experienced what his will is for us in these times of dread.

Can you pray for Zach?

C Michael Patton
C Michael Patton

C. Michael Patton is the primary contributor to the Parchment and Pen/Credo House Blog. He has been in ministry for nearly twenty years as a pastor, author, speaker, and blogger. Th.M. Dallas Theological Seminary (2001), president of Credo House Ministries and Credo Courses, author of Now that I'm a Christian (Crossway, 2014) Increase My Faith (Credo House, 2011), and The Theology Program (Reclaiming the Mind Ministries, 2001-2006), host of Theology Unplugged, and primary blogger here at Parchment and Pen. But, most importantly, husband to a beautiful wife and father to four awesome children. Michael is available for speaking engagements. Find him everywhere: Find him everywhere

    53 replies to "Too Scrared to Pray"

    • C Michael Patton

      We have some vitamins that are in some water, but for some reason he can sense (a sixth sense?) what is good for him and he is magnetically replused by it. 🙂

      We keep trying.

    • cheryl u

      What about some of the chewable chldren’s vitamins that taste really good, supposedly? Or would he automatically be repulsed by those too??

    • C Michael Patton

      Oh, he loves those. He would eat the whole bottle if we would let him. The doc says that he needs proteins, iron, and fat. We are trying bacon.

      Really, it was the virus that cause the low blood. Hopefully his current diet will still bring it back up. He love hotdogs (well, loves in a relative sort of way—he will eat about two bits.)

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